How Racial Identity and Attitudes Develop in Young Children

It's important to know how young children develop. It can help you decide what you should be talking about and what activities to do with your child at each stage. Here are some general benchmarks that show how young children develop racial and cultural identity and attitudes. These lists describe average development – all children develop at their own pace.

Two- and three-year-olds

Become increasingly aware of how people look
Become aware of the differences between boys and girls
Become curious about skin color, hair color and texture, eye shape and color, as well as other physical characteristics
May begin to notice more obvious physical disabilities, such as a person using a wheelchair
Talk about themselves in terms of how they look and what they can do, such as "I have long hair" and "I can jump high"
Begin to become aware of how boys/men and girls/women act and are expected to act, noticing that girls play more frequently with dolls, while boys play more often with trucks
May also be aware of ethnic identity, noticing such things as children eating foods of different cultures
May being to show signs of pre-prejudices (the ideas and feelings in very young children that may later develop into real prejudices when reinforced by biases that exist in society)
May show fear of approaching people that look different than them, or may only play with dolls or children that look like them

Three- and four-year-olds

Seek explanations for differences
Are aware of their own and others' physical characteristics
Want to know their identity: how they got their skin, hair, and eye color
May question why racial group "color" names are different from the actual colors
May make comments such as, "I'm not black, I'm brown!"
May also be curious about variations within their extended family and why two people with different skin colors may be considered part of the same group
Begin to wonder if skin, hair, and eye color will remain constant, as they begin to recognize that getting older brings physical changes
May ask questions like "Will my skin color change when I grow up?" and "Will you always be white?"

Four- and five-year-olds

Begin to identify with the ethnic group to which they belong
Can more fully explore the range of difference and similarity within and between racial and ethnic groups
Begin to understand scientific explanation for differences in skin color, hair texture, and eye shape
Are more aware of family traditions and family history